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Tag Archives: life

Too Good To Be True


I am so fine! Everywhere I go I get mens mouths salivating as if they were inhaling the aroma arising from their favorite dish. With tight eyes and a closed fist covering their lips they shout out taunts to me like, “Day-yum! You look gooood ” or “Can I be your baby daddy?” A mêlée begins to break out (they’re talking about beating up some-body) when they catch a glimpse of this bodacious booty. It’s a beauty. Plus, I’m pretty in the face and thin in the waist. I’ve dated all kinds of men from doctors and lawyers to professional sports athletes and entertainers. I’m what they call a ‘dime’. That means a 10 on a scale of one to ten, ten being the highest. I have been spoiled with all kinds of gifts from cars to condos. That’s right. So you know what I got to be working with. I stay fit at the gym. Yes, I gets it in. I don’t have an indication of any indentations on these thick thighs. Flawless! When I walk some mistake it for a trot because I’m built like a stallion. All women hate my presence because their prospective husbands catch a cramp in their necks trying to keep up with me. I’m like an exotic flower bud that they’d love to watch come into full bloom. They need to get over it because I don’t want them fools! They aint got no money honey. I can sniff out limited funds like a credit card charge. Declined! It just comes with years of experience and ,of course, experience is the best teacher. That reminds me… I have an IQ of 119. The average persons is 100 and nothing is average about me… except my shoe size. Child please! You’ll never come across another woman quite like I. Hi, my name is Unique and I’m an addict.

 
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Posted by on March 1, 2011 in Message

 

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Rain, Rain, Go Away?


 PLEASE!!! Quit trying to rain on my parade. I get so fed up with all the negativity. All this negative energy literally sucks the life out of me! You’re like a leech. You latch on to all the beauty I am displaying with my rays of hope and sunshine smile, that’s so blinged out it would take the Rap world by storm. The time is at hand for you to come over and prove me wrong and make me look… not so bright. You hastily make your way over with your weary walk wielding your umbrella of  despair desperately trying to change the atmosphere. The weather today called for no clouds but now… Now you want to engage me in a lacks-a-daisy conversation to no avail! At first, I try to ignore you by not making eye contact but I notice you not noticing me not noticing you by your commitment to continue on your Pursuit of unHappyness. ” Omg! What a bummer!”, I say to you in a loud voice on the inside of me because I don’t want to be too harsh. Your mouth opens and regurgitates depressing thoughts of failure. The stench makes my ears wanna hurl! Now that you willingly have my attention I suggest that you be more positive. To change your attitude to help change the situation. With down trodden eyebrows and similar head shake you tell me how you have already tried that method and it doesn’t work. In the back of my mind I’m thinking “I have to cancel my subscription to that magazine Changing Times that quotes ‘An optimist is a driver who thinks that empty space by the curb won’t have a fire hydrant beside it’.” After a good 30 minutes of a vicious tongue-lashing and some private thoughts that I say out loud inside of myself I feel like I’ve endured a natural disaster. Internally assaulted by Hurricane Hugo! He is the only one I can think of besides Katrina. (It would be totally inappropriate to use her because I’m a heterosexual female and a hurricane is water so it totally fits my theme). I said all of that to say this. Where there is sunshine there is rain. Never stop planting the seed no matter how exhausting it can be. All seed will not land on fertile ground. However; under the right weather conditions anything is possible. A plant can’t grow without water and plenty of sunshine. Isn’t that awful?!

 
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Posted by on February 26, 2011 in Life Lessons

 

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